Monday, April 28, 2008

Wifey is at it again!

Once more she is off in the land that is known to many as "The Empire State", or to me as "that dirty, stinking city that houses the Yankees and Jets (or at least, in the case of the Jets, their dirty, stinking fans)". Yup, she is in New York. Now for those of you who missed her as a goddess of the forest, you will have to deal with the diminished expectations of her portraying a slave who SECRETLY RUNS A MAJOR COLONY IN THE NEW WORLD!!!!! (ever notice that she never gets cast as "Woman sitting at table"?)

Her new piece is called Seaport Story. Check out the link HERE.

Join us next week when Wifey is Joan of Arc. Not acting, but actually possessed by the spirit of her, and then she leads a revolt down the streets of Hampden!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Today's Mood Is...

...but wait, there's more...

Continuing Today's Mood...

Jeffrey Chaucer hath two turntables AND a microphone! Verily he be not a sucka!
Who's house? Beowulf's house!
911 is a joke! Zounds!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Today's Mood Is...

I wish everyone was in love with me. I guess I am just not enough of a weiner.

Now for the fun part...

The hospital in general, and Moleville in particular, is very Mommy Dearest friendly. What do I mean by that? I mean that there are no wire hangers to be found anywhere.

Now WHY would that be a problem?

Let's introduce a hypothetical scenario. Let's say, for instance, that Wifey had a fitful night of sleeping, with a predilection towards violence and Policy of Appeasement-like territory usurpation. Let us also suppose that a certain ass-breathed dog was employed with Panzer-like precision in order to assist in the territorial disputes. So with all of these things happening overnight, it could be easy to come to the conclusion that the person on the receiving end of these vicious, baseless attacks would be tired when he woke up and left for work.

What does all of this add up to? Well, it could add up to someone (the tragic hero of our story), while getting out of his car in order to go into the office this morning, remembering to turn the car off, but forgetting to take his keys out of the ignition. Luckily, since it was a bit chilly, but otherwise nice day and (unlike his seemingly bloodless, unable-to-retain-heat Wifey) he left his windows cracked open. All he needs is a wire hanger to stretch out and he can get right into his vehicle and go about his day.


I might be here for a while.


Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Today's Mood Is...

Wifey (who is currently snoring away on the couch while suffering from a nasty cold that I believe Wifey's Momm-o has infected her with the plague, and it only by divine providence that I do not share in her misery) wanted me to post. So I am. I am officially one answer higher on pretty much all survey questionnaires now.

...with a side of...

...which makes me feel like...

...and because I am so old now, I will need you to...

...and so the circle of life continues anon...

Friday, April 04, 2008

Today's Mood Is...

Grrrr, baby. VERY grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Gherkin, please!

I was scanning through some of my favorite sites when I came upon this quote from current Arizona Diamondback (and former Baltimore Oriole) Eric Byrnes.

Before I post the quote, some of you may be wondering why I am not posting this on the ol' sports blog, well, with the exception of the "Who's on First" routine from Opening Day, I try to keep overtly comical bits from that site. And "1st" is such a classic that it cannot be categorized like my usual peurile humor nuggets.

Anyway, here is the quote, speaking to the possibility of even more stringent drug testing in Major League Baseball...

Arizona Diamondbacks outfielder Eric Byrnes on mandatory drug testing: ''I'd prefer not to have a grown man standing there looking at my pickle, but if they have to do it for the sake of the game, I'm in."
Talk about giving it up for the team...

More proof of the absolute awesomeness of Thor

These are completely and totally stolen from , one of the greatest time wasting sites ever (if you like comic books and REALLY snarky commentary. I like both, increasing the awesomeness of the site at least tenfold).
Since I work (albeit in a bastard stepson capacity) for a dental office, these pictures are doubly awesome as they show not only the awesomeness of Thor, but also the importance of regular dental checkups. If the evil super-snake had just seen his dentist for regular flouride treatments, mayhap Thor would not have completely shattered his mandibular and maxilarry teeth.
But wait, is there an opposing opinion to the necessity of flouride treatments?

Best of the Question

The actual quote about flouride is about 6:30 into the clip, but the entire clip is worth watching, as the Question is one of the coolest characters from the JLU.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Today's Mood Is...

Today I will both rock AND roll.

Today's OTHER Mood Is...

Look down and you will see why...

20 Best Karate Kicks Ever

Play "Count the Van Dammes". It's fun.

Although there is a dearth of Bruce Lee kicks here. I find that disappointing.