Friday, January 06, 2006

I feel a litle better now

Okay, I am back. Obviously I didn't get to come back to this while the iron was still hot, but since I have been fighting off the effects of a concussion for almost 2 weeks, I think I have a valid excuse (and no I will not tell you how I got a concussion. At least not right now). I have had time to cool off, but I do want to clear up what all the crap was I put at the end of the last post. I am just going to cover them one step at a time...
  • Female priests - I just cannot understand how someone can say thatGod does not speak through women, but can only speak through a man. Something tells me that was added by someone not so divine.
  • Homosexuality - Why would someone choose a lifestyle that brings them public scrutiny and scorn, and prevents them from procreating? They wouldn't. No one chooses to be a homosexual any more than someone chooses to be Asian. It is the way the genes connect. There was a study done a few years ago (and I wish I could find the link) that showed twins where one was homosexual and one wasn't, and it showed that there was a difference in the DNA strain. And MY God doesn't punish anyone who loves others, whoever the other is. He punishes the wicked who do not repent and do not accept Him as their personal Saviour. It's that easy.
  • 100 years ago, I would have been persecuted like homosexuals are now (I meant persecution, not prosecution last post. I was in a hurry). Why? Because I am left handed, and left handed people were punished, whipped and beaten, and forced to renounce their preference for using the left hand as their dominant hand. Sounds kinda idiotic, doesn't it? Well that is how it was. I can only hope that in another 100 years that homosexuals will be treated like left handed people are today. Maybe they will also have special scissors like we did back in school. Instead of having green rubber on he handle, it can be a rainbow striped rubber.

Honestly, the rest of the points are for a different post. I would, however, like to post an old email that was sent to me by an old friend I have lost contact with. He goes by Sos Dumpowski, but his friends call him Nick. He was (and I assume still is) a very cool guy who had an outlook on life that I shared. Here you go...

Why can't I own Canadians?

Background:Laura Schlessinger is a US radio personality who dispenses advice topeople who call in to her radio show. Recently, she said that as an observant Orthodox Jew, she holds homosexuality as an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22 and cannot be condoned in any circumstance. The following is an open letter to Dr. Laura penned bya US resident, which was posted on the Internet.

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and I try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the specific laws and how to follow them.

a) When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord (Lev. 1:9). The problem is my neighbors.They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

b) I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fairprice for her?

c) I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness (Lev. 15:19-24). The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

d) Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

e) I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligatedto kill him myself?

f) A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination (Lev. 11:10), it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree.Can you settle this?

g) Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggleroom here?

h) Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev.19:27. How should they die?

i) I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

j) My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyesterblend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? (Lev.24:10-16) Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging. Your devoted disciple and adoring fan.

And in case you want to question the validity of the Bible references, you can go here...;&version=31;

I put one up for you, you can search the rest up at the top.

I promise my next post will be full of irreverent wit and humility. And 50% less smiting!

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