Wednesday, April 06, 2011

An Open Letter To Mrs. Holton (sp?) from United Concordia

Mrs. Holton,

I thank you for explaining in painstaking detail what happens when someone faxes something. I always had a sneaking suspicion that some kind of voodoo or necromancy was involved in making a piece of paper's information be able to fly across a phone line and reappear in the same order somewhere else.

I also understand that if I put something in the mail that you do not receive that it is not your fault for not receiving it. But thank you for also making sure to emphasize that information by telling me 7 times during the conversation.

However, I do hope you understand that I am concerned that a claim I have sent multiple times to an address I just verified as the correct one will mysteriously not arrive again, and since you demand that you receive the claim before you can comment on it, I am now in the middle of a difficult situation that I see no way out of short of faxing or emailing you said claims. Telling me that if I fax them to the number that you provided and then telling me that you will try to receive them and then try to forward them to the claims department does not, after examining the history of our relationship both with the claims and this conversation, fill me with confidence of receiving reimbursement for the services provided.

Stop it. Please.


  1. Let her know that for a nominal charge the Office Space repair team can work over, I mean work on her fax machine to bring it in line.

    In other news, are you allowed to send things by certified mail?

  2. Boss says it is too expensive.