I love celebrating Memorial Day in March

and THAT is what will be happening sooner that you think. Yesterday was the day after Christmas. I had to work both jobs. When I went into Target I walked past the display of greeting cards. I expected to see the leftover Christmas cards on clearance, but there was not a Christmas card to be found on display. But guess what was there in their stead. I'll give you three guesses...

If you said "Valentine's Day" you made the right call!

DECEMBER 26TH and I am inundated with VALENTINE'S DAY CARDS?!?!?!?!? Why not a big display filled with seed packets for Arbor Day? Is it too early to Put out the Halloween costumes?

And why does Valentine's Day need a 2 month lead in? Is it just to torture the husbands/boyfriends of the world? We have finally gotten past the "subtle" hints for a Christmas gift that comes in a small box labeled Kays or Zales or Jared or some other damn place, and now we have to see and hear MORE ads for "show her you love her. Say it with diamonds". Sure, and next year I'll say it with bankruptcy (where is a high hat sound effect when you need it?). I am lucky that Wifey is not jewelry obsessed (although she DID make 3 separate "suggestions" for next year's Christmas gift. And also took each opportunity to remind me that she has a birthday and we have an anniversary before Christmas rolls around again. If anyone who reads this goes to one of those fancy Catholic churches I see on the television and in movies PLEASE light one of those cool altar candles for me. I have always wanted someone to do that for me and I don't think it has ever been done. And while I appreciate the sentiment, the one you have in the hallway next to the bathroom just doesn't have the same effect, even if it DOES make the entire house smell like sugar cookies or fresh linen or whatever fricking candle-of-the-month Yankee Candle is hawking this month).

In case you are wondering, Wifey is doing pretty well/good (I like to use improper grammar sometimes, but not all the time. This way I get to do both in one sentence) with her recovery. This surgery was a little more intense that the last one, and she will actually have to go for physical therapy this time. But she keeps promising me increased flexibility, and for that I will get her whatever damn resistance equipment she needs.

Also, last night we had a bit of a conversation.

--Sidebar--

Wifey has complained on more than one occasion about my inability to fall asleep when we go to bed. I will usually start to ramble on about any number of topics. And because my body is tired but my brain has too much information collected throughout the day to process, I will get kind of goofy at bedtime. Anyone who knows me knows that goofy is not much of a stretch for me anyway, but I do feel bad about subjecting Wifey to this. At least I did until last night. Last night I came home exhausted. I have not slept well for the better part of a month, and going back to the 2-a-day grind after 4 straight days of one or no jobs wore me out. So I laid down and got bundled up in my blankets and quickly began nodding off. Well Wifey came downstairs and got herself all ready for bed and decided that she wanted to talk. And talk.

AND TALK.

I was silently praying that the drugs they gave her for the pain would kick in and she would go into WifeyComaVille (soon to be a theme restaurant by Jimmy Buffet), but no such luck. I began to think that she hadn't taken any lately. And THAT is when she decided to drop the bombshell on me

--Sidebar to the sidebar--

Wifey's Mama gave each of us a movie and a book for Christmas. She gave me the Special Edition of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which I never bought because I have the original on video but have wanted to buy since it came out. So that was in fact an awesome gift. The book she gave me (and Wifey got her own copy of the same book) was "The Purpose Driven Life". I am looking forward to reading this book. But I was not expecting the personal inscription in the book (and the matching one in Wifey's book) that referred to the journey from birth through life through MORE BIRTH. If I didn't know better I would think she was pining for grandkids (it has always seemed weird to me that the parents of a female would want their daughter to get pregnant, even after she is married. That means that someone had to, well, you know. And at this point in my life I cannot fathom a parent, ESPECIALLY a father, being okay with someone touching his daughter even after she is made an honest woman. I do not see my ambiguity on this fading if Wifey and I have a daughter. God I hope we have all boys. I don't think I will survive the ulcers that having a daughter would give me). So it seems that the pressure cooker is finally on us. My parents have 2 grandkids already (courtesy of my sister and brother-in-law) so there is a release valve there. Mama-in-law has no such outlet for her desires. Well...

--back to original sidebar--

Wifey started talking about being ready to try and have a kid starting sometime next year.

I have wanted kids for a while (with Wifey I started thinking about it on or about our 3rd date, as I was trying to figure out a way to get her in the sack. Back then she was much better at holding her liquor, so that wasn't a viable option. I wound up having to use charm. I didn't know I had it. There is a good chance I don't. But whatever the hell it was, she bought it. YAY me!). When we first got serious enough to discuss marriage, she said that she wanted to wait 5 years. I said I didn't want to wait that long. She said she would consider 2 or 3, but she wanted us to have some time first. I agreed with her that it was a good idea, and I am glad she said it because we haven't exactly had a whole bunch of time with each other as it is. If we had some tiny poop machine in the house it might have become impossible to see each other at all. The news that she is thinking about getting ourselves ready to have kids as soon as next year (health and financial planning will be necessary) is something I have been waiting to hear her say.

But not on a Wednesday at 1:45 in the morning when I have an alarm clock that will be going off in less than 4 hours.

And here is the thing. I don't know if she did take any of her "happy fun pills" last night, and if she did I don't know what time she took them. I know that she was a little (okay, more than a little) legally stoned at my sister's house Christmas Day, and she mentioned my sister-in-law's munchkin as one of the impeti (what is the plural for impetus? Impetusses? Impetae?) for the decision. My fear is that hillbilly heroin and watching a tot wander about got her primordial maternal instincts all worked up into a frothy lather, but in a week she will be back on the propho-train, which means I am still playing for USC (please tell me you get that).

We didn't talk much about it after she dropped her "KNOCK ME UP" sign on my head and then rolled over to go to sleep. I left this morning before she was awake enough to realize that I had to go to work. I am waiting to see what conversations we have tonight. Rest assured I will let you know the good parts.

BSR