Monday, June 09, 2008

Here they come!!!!

Yes, we are in fact in the middle of a mini heatwave here in Maryland. Mid to upper 90's, with humidity, crappy air quality, overall sucktitude of weather. It is supposed to break by tomorrow afternoon / evening, when a cold front brings BIG ASS THUNDERSTORMS (yes, that IS the meteorological term) and temps in the mid to lower 80's without the humidity. The weekend is supposed to be just LOVELY.

However, with the upturn in temperature there comes another annoyance. You saw them a few months ago, probably last in late February or early March (I honestly don't recall when the change was here). They are everywhere. Odds are you have at least one of them at work, and if you go out into public, say to the grocery store or to the gas station, you will see them in clusters. They have been waiting impatiently for the chance to attack you with their idiocy, and there really is no defense (especially if you are dealing with the one from work, or even worse, the family member) unless you want to utterly offend them.

It is the return of the "Hot enough for you?" asshat.

It has been building in their brains since the last time they could justify asking someone (whether they knew them or not) if it was cold enough for that particular person, and finally they can have their sweet release. It must be painful for someone who only has two ways to open a conversation, and is utterly screwed from March to June / July, and again from September through November or December, to have to hold it in like that. I guess that this mini heatwave will alleviate some people and allow them to use those walnut - sized brains for other things, like figuring out who the Mole is, or trying to find a way to figure out if the refrigerator light goes out when they close the door.

Here in Moleville we do in fact have one of those people. Of course, she is the one who needs to belabor the obvious on just about EVERY topic of conversation or occurance that (in her mind) requires commentary. She is one of the most fervent followers of the "I know THAT'S right" school of conversation, and you know that as soon as she walked in the door it began with a loud "Whoo-WHEE it is HOT OUT-SIDE TO-DAY!!!!!", amazingly following it with "I know THAT'S RIGHT!". Yes, she knows that she was in fact correct and that her last statement was accurate. I am very happy for her and her building up her self confidence and self assurance.

I cannot wait until I have to go get lunch. The conversations are going to be STUNNING.

1 comment:

  1. It's hot. Real hot.

    I saw a little man in orange robes burst into flames.

    True story.