I do not know why some of you do not like Wifey and me. I cannot think of a single thing that we have ever done to you for you to be offended by, and if there is something, you have never approached us so there is no way we could rectify the problem. Instead you call Animal Control for non-existent issues with a dog that is never mistreated and a yard that is never left in distress or as unkempt. You tell your children not to talk to us, even though all we have ever done is treat you and your children with respect.
We go about our lives and do nothing to bother you, and still you snipe at us and complain to the authorities from afar. Well I wish I could say I was sorry to tell you this, but it is about to backfire on you. You see, not all of our neighbors have a problem with us. Some of them realize that all we want to do is live in peace and fix up the house as much as possible as much as we can. We want to improve the community. That is why we picked that house, because we believe in the neighborhood. And still some of you attack us from behind your OZ-like curtain. Well others see us for who we are. And others happen to be old friends with the people in charge of the authorities that you have called on us over and over again for no reason. And when that person happens to see that other neighbor, and that neighbor asks why his people are always out there bothering us, and he says that his office gets complaints all the time, well, that neighbor who sees us for who we are tells their old friend that we aren't any kind of problem, but there are others who are. Let me tell you who they are.
Karma, it is a female dog. Just like that male one up there is going to be when he completes that particular maneuver. I hope you like the taste of your own nuts, because you are about to be fed a steady diet of yourself.
Pass the salt, bitches.